Setting the Tone in Your Home

Photo by:digidreamgrafix

“If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Pardon the bad English, but the saying is true. No one sets the atmosphere in the home like the lady of the house. (This goes for singles, too.)

You create the right tone in several ways: 

1. Thoughtful decoration—You don’t have to be rich or artistic to have a pleasant-looking home. Work with what you have to create a mood. Put time and thought into it. A lot depends on the climate (sunny or rainy) and the basic furnishings you already have. Make sure your decoration is something that’s comfortable for you and your family. (I don’t recommend white carpet and couch! Choose furnishings that work for real people with real kids.) Go for a restful, non-cluttered effect. Reflect your family personality. 
2. A healthily clean home—Notice I didn’t say spotless. Make sure you have a clean kitchen and bathroom. Change sheets regularly, and clean surfaces. You don’t have to be perfect, just healthy.
3. Good smells in the house, especially at dinnertime—It’s not necessary to be a gourmet cook in order to have yummy smells in your home. Wholesome tasty food, fruit, and baking make a house smell like a home.
4. Quiet—Your home should be a haven for the family. The TV doesn’t need to be on 24/7 and the kids don’t need DVDs or video games all the time, either. There should be some quiet—time that can be spent reading, in Bible study, and in good, wholesome, creative play.
5. A thankful spirit—There’s much to be said for the two words, “thank you.” Say them often, and praise God often. Be thankful for anything anyone does for you. This is especially important with your husband and children. Say “thank you” every time, and teach your children to do the same.
6. Lack of tension, strife, and yelling—Resolve problems quickly and thoroughly. Learn to count (or time-out or whatever you need to do) so that you don’t scream and holler when people get you riled. You are an adult, and with the Lord’s help, you can learn to act with restraint and wisdom.
7. Hospitality—Open your home to others and thoroughly enjoy having company.
8. Fun, games, and laughter—Your home should be the “funnest” place on earth for your family and friends. Play games with the kids. Laugh a lot. Be silly sometimes. Enjoy life!
9. Love—If anyone were to describe the atmosphere in your home, it should be “a place where love reigns.” Love God. Love your husband. Love your children and visitors. People should actually “feel the love” when they’re in your house.
10. Your own joyful countenance—It’s easy to compare your house to the one on Pinterest or even where your sister lives. It’s easy to get tired of doing the same old things daily. It’s easy to lose your vision for your family and the lost, trying to live godly while raising a family, teaching, leading, and sometimes, being persecuted. How can you smile and be truly joyful? How can you be genuine?

You have to rely on the Lord. Believe me, I understand it’s hard to have a quiet time when you have toddlers. I know it’s not easy to meet the needs of husband, children, and ministry and feast on the Word and pray. But, your time with God is the most necessary fuel for your life. You can’t give what you don’t have.

God is more interested in your spirit than in your service.

Make a daily time to be with Him, if you don’t have one already. It can be any time that is best for you. During the seasons of my life, I’ve found different times. When I had a baby, nursing was an ideal time to meet with my Lord. When I had a toddler, naptime was good. When the kids were homeschooling, the time after lunch and before the afternoon activities worked best for me. When is your best time? Reserve it for the Lord.

Where is your best place? A place that’s uninterrupted, where you can shut the door. (Teach your children to respect your place. “Mommy’s having her time with God now. When the whichever room door is shut, do not come in, unless it’s an emergency.”)

Keep your “date” with the Lord every day. It will recharge your spiritual and physical batteries, give you guidance, keep your sins confessed, and it will make all the difference in the atmosphere in your home. When Mama meets with God, all the family benefits. So will your ministry.

Every wise woman buildeth her house.

(Proverbs 14:1a)

She openeth her mouth with wisdom;

and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

She looketh well to the ways of her household,

and eateth not the bread of idleness.

Her children arise up, and call her blessed;

her husband also, and he praiseth her.

Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain:

but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

Give her of the fruit of her hands;

and let her own works praise her in the gates.

(Proverbs 31:26-28, 30-31)