Whatever Happened to Church Discipline?

During his message, a pastor declares he doesn't think much of church discipline.* A few weeks later, the reason why comes to light: he is having an affair.

A young lady is pregnant by a man in her church. She has the baby and lives with the guy. The father and mother are welcomed to continue in full church fellowship, even though they're living in sin.

A member of the church divorces his wife, has a few flings, lives for a while with a married woman, and later marries another woman. The church never confronts, and he continues to attend.

A couple lives in sin and then asks the church to give them a confirmation service after they get legally married. They get married, the marriage confirmation is in the church, and the issue of fornication is never dealt with.

There's a pedophile in the church. The pastoral staff covers it up because this guy is a deacon and they don't want to make waves or scare anyone.

Two marriages are broken through divorce, and the divorced ex-husband and ex-wife marry. No church takes action—not his, and not hers.

I remember witnessing a church deal publicly with a matter of immorality. In this instance, the member openly repented, tearfully asked the church's forgiveness, has never repeated the sin, and is in good standing with God, family, and church today. This is the way church discipline is supposed to work.

Church discipline has one goal: restoration to God and church. It also has a beautiful process. It's only a few verses long. Let's read it. Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican (Matthew 18:15-17). As you can see, this also applies to personal offences between believers.

What are the steps? It's important to understand them.

• Step 1.  The offended person goes to the offender and tries to settle the problem, just the two of them alone. Ideally, it should end there, with the resolution of the issue. No one else needs to be involved.
• Step 2.  If Step 1 doesn't work, the offended person takes one or two people with him to confront the offender again with the goal of conflict resolution.
• Step 3.  If Step 2 doesn't work, then the matter is brought before the church. If there is no resolution (repentance and forgiveness), the offending person will be excluded from the church community—until he publicly repents of his sin and is restored into fellowship.

How many times we've seen this done wrong. In one instance, the offender wanted to bring witnesses. Many times, though, the biblical process isn't even begun.

Why?

Here are two possible reasons:

1. We like the sinner. Let's face it, especially in cases of immorality, the sinner is a gregarious, pleasing person. (He wouldn't be in an affair, if he weren't.) The sinner might be a friend, a leader in the church, a Sunday school teacher, or the church pianist. We ignore the sin, because the person is likeable.
2. We like sin. No thanks to Adam, every person on this earth has a sin nature, and that makes us sympathetic towards sin. As a result, we choose not to judge anyone for public, unrepented sins, because we kind of enjoy sinning ourselves.

These are both wrong, of course. The Apostle Paul could hardly believe the church in Corinth was tolerating adultery. A man in the church was living with his father's wife. Paul said, It is reported commonly that there is fornication among you, and such fornication as is not so much as named among the Gentiles, that one should have his father's wife. And ye are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he that hath done this deed might be taken away from among you (1 Corinthians 5:1-2).

Let me take a minute to clarify something. Church discipline is for public sins.

For example, if you have an ugly thought about someone, that's a private sin. Go to the Lord, and ask Him for forgiveness. 1 John 1:9 was written to Christians: If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (Do not call that person up and tell him you thought something bad about him and ask his forgiveness. This will hurt him unnecessarily.) It was a sin of wrong thinking, and it needs to stay between you and the Lord. Confess it, substitute thanks and praise, accept God's forgiveness, and go on with your life.

For issues between two people, misunderstandings, etc., the offended person goes to the person who offended him, and they try to resolve the problem.

Public sins include: immorality, theft, assault, not honoring parents, lying, murder, etc. (See the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20.) Those will be dealt with in the steps outlined in Matthew 18. If at Step 1, 2 or 3, there's repentance, exclusion from church fellowship never happens.

Why is church discipline sometimes necessary? God can't bless a church that harbors sin. Remember the graphic account of Annanias and Saphira (Acts 5:1-10)? They agreed to lie to the church about their giving, and God struck them dead. Sin in the church is serious. It is sad and requires repentance. God is holy.

The good news is that God is always ready to forgive, and we should be, too. When someone repents publicly, we need to forgive that person. Jesus explained after giving His disciples the Lord's prayer: For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (Matthew 6:14-15).

There are consequences with sin, and the church must handle some kinds of sins differently from others, especially predatory crimes. In those cases, it's important to keep anyone with this history out of ministries with children and teens. That doesn't mean that a repentant person can't serve in the church in any capacity, only that he/she forfeits the right to work with minors. Churches also have the responsibility to report any crimes to the appropriate authorities. These things must be taken seriously and never hidden.

Church discipline is important. Tolerating sin undermines a church's testimony, and God can't bless. No one likes church discipline, but sometimes, it's necessary.

Take heed therefore unto yourselves,

and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost

hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God,

which he hath purchased with his own blood.

(Acts 20:28)

* All are true stories; most occurred decades ago.