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The Monster Within: Facing an Eating Disorder by Cynthia
Rowland McClure is a fascinating testimony of one prosperous young woman’s
battle against bulimia. She reveals why she finally decided to get help and all
of the process behind her journey. It isn’t an easy, fun, painless process.
It’s hard. It’s brutal. It’s emotional.
“To get to hope, you must have courage to face and battle
the monsters within.” That’s exactly how Cynthia felt—like there was a monster
inside her, controlling her. She says, “Those who have an eating disorder are
obsessed with the body, not the heart. But it is the heart that is really
hungry.”
“The questions . . . are ‘What are you really hungry
for?’ ‘When did the madness begin?’ ‘What was going on in your life and who
told you you were damaged?’” All through the book, she’s asked, “When did you
become damaged goods?” Finally, Cynthia figures it out, and that is the
beginning of healing.
Another thing that really impressed me was that several of
the causes of her very deep hurts weren’t
true at all. When she finally confronts her experiences, talks to her
parents, and finds out what really happened when she was a child, the events
that were the most damaging to her didn’t
happen the way she perceived them. This ended up devastating, so devastating
that Cynthia was repeatedly suicidal—even in the hospital.
There are many lessons in this book. As a counselor, I
learned some interesting points about counseling people who self harm. As a
Christian, I learned about how to confront old memories and forgive. I also
better understood how, in a good Christian family, perceptions can go horribly
wrong very easily. It’s a call for transparency and communication in families.
This book is a revealing glimpse into anorexia and bulimia and the hard battle
to come back from the brink.
My only problem with this book is with some of the
counseling methods that are used in the mental hospital. They include
threatening, bullying, and lying. Of course, the therapists weren’t coming from
a Christian perspective. I understand that their methods wouldn’t be the same
as a Christian psychologist’s.
I’m glad Cynthia told her story and that she is helping
others to find peace and healing. I believe this book is important for those
who counsel and for people who work with teens and young adults. It’s also a
good read for parents of teens, so that they can recognize troubling signs that
might indicate an eating disorder.
